When you think of new home in most cases you associate this with positive emotions. Change that you anticipated, as either dream came true or at least this is a relief from current worries. You think of how you will decorate it. What paint to put on the walls and how your life will be better in your new house. It’s not very often when you think of new place to live you fight off the idea as it would be just a beginning of nightmare that you wish quickly to wake up from…
– My name is Captain Alexandra, I will be leading you through the training program. In the coming days we will be conducting some more tests, some will be easy and some painful nevertheless main purpose of those tests are to establish the best training course for your Son. In case of any questions feel free to ask me as I am available for you all time. I will leave you for now to get use to this idea that from now on this will be your new home. Please do not expect to leave our premises soon as your Son is very special and we need to monitor closely his progress. – She was young and trying to keep her face serious but deep insight her eyes for some strange reason you could feel compassion. A feeling you will not see often as people are more to avoid suffering in their life. And keep distant from situations that will remind them that life is not always full of smiles. A feeling that you will more often see in the eyes of those who you would never expected to see and not in those who you though are close to you. Once she left we looked at each other still not fully believed that this is happening to us. On one hand we felt that this is something very dramatic, horrible that we are facing but on the other our mind was telling us not to worry, this will be quickly over and you will be back to your old, boring lives. This strange phenomena was long with us and till this day from time to time we still hope that it is just a bad dream and we will wake up soon from it.
After couple of minutes one of the corporals walked into our room and explained all the logistics. That we need to rent or buy a bed on which one of the parents will be sleeping at night. Where is shared kitchen, bathroom and shower, to which each night there is a queue of mothers waiting for her turn to have her 10 minutes of peace. Those ten minutes where you can cry, scream, do all you need to do in order to release some of that sadness from you. Sadness you don’t want your child to see as he is suffering enough and you don’t want to add more to him. When to expect food for your children, food that you would not give to your dog as it is too awful to eat. And all the other things you need to know in order to survive.
Our initial impression was that those corporals treat you like an intruder, person not really welcomed, who is just disturbing them in their daily work. Impression that was one of most misleading ones. Later we saw that those serving marines were the ones that help us on the way. Mostly correcting some decisions made by higher ranked soldiers and providing you with energy that is essential in the battle against the successful finish of the program. But mostly helped in keeping your child still in your arms and not allowing to deport to heaven earlier than planned.
The irony of your new home is that place that you hated at the beginning you start to miss when you change the locations as this is your rock, your sanctuary. Place, which after couple of months, you know so well that you started to feel safe there and would not like to leave to any other.